If you read my last blog, being a nice guy generally leads to not being a nice guy. What I mean by this is that if a man continues to be there for everyone and is constantly trying to please others, he may find himself feeling stressed, empty, depressed and irritable. This is not healthy long term and can lead to burn out.
Many nice guys may then engage in abusing alcohol, drugs, sex, T.V., food, gambling and more. Many of these behaviors and substances may also be done in secret, as the nice guy feels guilty or ashamed for doing this. If you or someone you know is constantly trying to please others to the point that it is leading to more problems, then now is a good time to seek some support from friends, family and even a therapist that specializes in working with men.
The truth is that there are lot of nice guys are there, and it is nothing to be ashamed about. There are many reasons, why someone becomes a nice guy, I will share some of them in my next blog. The good news is that instead of stopping everything that you are doing, it is better to work with someone that can help you see what is positive and healthy and to begin working on boundaries with the rest.
The men I work with share that they feel a lot of relief just being able to share about the struggle to “always be on” and take care of everyone. These men generally did not learn how to take care of themselves in childhood and many of them are getting to the point of resentment as others do not always reciprocate the support and love they give to others. It does not have to be this way. There is hope for men that want to be nice, but also want to have their needs met. Learn more in this blog or by making an appointment with me.
For more information contact, David Sanchez, LPC, LCAS, CSAT, EMDR Trained Therapist. David Sanchez is a licensed professional counselor, a life coach, a licensed clinical addictions specialist, a certified sex addict therapist and an EMDR trained therapist. He practices in Charlotte, NC but can see individuals that live in the state of North Carolina or South Carolina through counseling via in-office, phone or secure video conferencing. Mr. Sanchez is also able to see someone that lives in the United States or abroad through his coaching and consulting services. If you would like to speak to him or one of his associates, please call 980-263-9608 or e-mail him at firstname.lastname@example.org.