Individual or Couples Therapy After Betrayal: What First?
Once you decide to get support after betrayal, a practical question often follows: should you start with individual therapy, couples therapy, or both at once? There is no universal answer, but understanding what each format offers, and what tends to work best in what order, can help you choose a starting point instead of guessing […]
Rebuilding Self-Esteem After Partner Betrayal
Betrayal often damages more than trust in your partner. It can quietly erode how you see yourself, sometimes so gradually that you do not notice the shift until you find yourself doubting things you once felt certain about. Many betrayed partners find themselves asking painful questions: Was I not enough? Did I miss obvious signs […]
Telling Family and Friends About Betrayal: What Helps
Deciding who to tell after discovering betrayal is often just as stressful as the betrayal itself, and it is a decision many betrayed partners have to make while still in shock. You may worry about being judged, about people taking sides, or about information spreading beyond your control, especially in a smaller community where your […]
How Long Does Healing From Betrayal Trauma Take?
“How long is this going to take?” is one of the most common questions betrayed partners ask, usually not long after the initial shock starts to wear off and the reality of what happened begins to sink in. There is no single timeline for healing from betrayal trauma, and anyone who promises an exact number […]
Should I Stay or Leave? Deciding After Betrayal
“Should I stay or should I leave?” is often the first question betrayed partners ask themselves, sometimes within minutes of discovery, and often before the initial shock has even had time to settle. It is also usually the wrong question to answer right away. Betrayal trauma affects clear thinking, and major decisions made in a […]
Self-Care for Betrayed Partners: Beyond “Give It Time”
“Just give it time” is well-meaning advice that betrayed partners hear constantly, and it rarely feels like enough, especially in the middle of a sleepless night or a day you cannot seem to get through. Time alone does not heal betrayal trauma. What helps is what you do with that time: how you care for […]
Grief After Betrayal: Mourning What You Thought You Had
Grief after betrayal often gets overlooked, because betrayal is usually talked about only in terms of anger, decision-making, or whether the relationship can be saved. But grief is often at the center of the pain, even when it goes unnamed. You are not just grieving what happened. You may be grieving the relationship you believed […]
Men’s Empathy Group in Charlotte, NC: What to Expect
If your partner has been hurt by your betrayal, you may already know that an apology alone will not repair what happened. Real repair usually requires something harder to learn: consistent, genuine empathy. This is exactly why Charlotte Counseling Associates offers the Help Her Heal Men’s Empathy and Communication Group in Charlotte, NC. If you […]
Choosing Therapy in South Charlotte: Next Steps to Get Started
Most people who are thinking about therapy already know they need it. What stops them is not knowing where to start. The process of finding a therapist can feel overwhelming, especially if your situation involves betrayal, addiction, or trauma. These are specialized needs, and a generalist therapist may not be the right fit. Knowing what […]
EMDR and Brainspotting for Ongoing Growth
Most people have heard of EMDR and Brainspotting in the context of trauma. Fewer people know that both are also valuable tools for the ongoing work of growth. When you are past the acute crisis but something still feels stuck, when the insight is there but the pattern hasn’t shifted, when talk therapy has taken […]
Couples Counseling in Charlotte: Strengthening Communication
Most couples who struggle with communication are not bad at talking. They are stuck in patterns of talking that make things worse. By the time a couple seeks counseling, the same argument has often been happening for years in different forms. The specific content changes, but the underlying dynamic stays the same. That dynamic is […]
Preventing Relapse: Recognizing Your Early Warning Signs
By the time a relapse happens, the process leading up to it has often been building for days, weeks, or even months. Most people in recovery focus on resisting the final moment of use. But relapse rarely arrives without warning. It moves through stages, and each stage has recognizable signals, if you know what to […]
Healthy Sexuality After Addiction: What Therapy Supports
Getting sober from sex or pornography addiction is one kind of work. Figuring out what healthy sexuality actually looks like after that is a different kind of work entirely. Many people in recovery feel uncertain, ashamed, or afraid about sexuality long after they have stopped the compulsive behavior. That discomfort is not a sign of […]
Shame Resilience: Moving From Hiding to Honest Connection
Shame does not want you to talk about it. That is part of how it keeps its hold. Whatever you are carrying, shame has likely told you that this particular thing is too much. Too ugly. Too disqualifying to admit to another person. It tells you that if anyone really knew, they would pull away. […]
Rebuilding Self-Trust After Betrayal and Trauma
After betrayal, you may stop trusting the person who hurt you. But what surprises many people is how quickly they also stop trusting themselves. The second loss is harder to name. You begin questioning your memory, your instincts, your judgment. You wonder how you missed what was happening or whether you were wrong about everything. […]
Long-Term Recovery: Building a Life That Feels Worth It
You have done the hard work of getting sober. But somewhere along the way, you may have realized that not using is not the same as living. Early recovery is often crisis-level work. Later recovery is something different. It is quieter, slower, and less talked about. It asks you to build a life that you […]
How to Talk About Porn Use Without a Fight
Conversations about porn use often carry fear, shame, anger, and confusion long before anyone says a word. One partner may feel hurt, unsafe, or deeply alone. The other may feel exposed, defensive, or certain that nothing they say will come out right. Under that kind of pressure, even a simple question can turn into an […]
Recovery Group Options in Charlotte: What to Look For
Finding a recovery group can feel hopeful and intimidating at the same time. You may want support, accountability, and connection, yet still worry about being judged or ending up in a space that does not fit your needs. Those concerns are common, especially if you have been trying to manage painful patterns on your own. […]
Men’s Sexual Betrayal in Charlotte: Breaking the Silence
Sexual betrayal is often discussed through one narrow lens, and that can leave men feeling unseen. Some are dealing with compulsive sexual behavior that has damaged trust. Others are reeling after discovering a partner’s secrecy, infidelity, or double life. In both cases, silence can grow quickly. Shame, confusion, anger, and isolation often keep men from […]
Accountability in Recovery: Groups vs Individual Therapy
Recovery usually needs more than willpower. People often do better when they have structure, honest reflection, and support that helps them stay aligned with their values instead of hiding from setbacks. Accountability can sound harsh at first. In healthy therapy, though, it is not about punishment or control. It is about telling the truth, noticing […]
Men’s Assertiveness: Boundaries Without Aggression
Assertiveness gets misunderstood, especially by men who were taught that strength means staying silent until they explode, or dominating the room before anyone can challenge them. In reality, assertiveness is neither passive nor aggressive. It is the ability to speak honestly, respect limits, and stay connected to your values while dealing with conflict. For some […]
Workaholism and Escape Behaviors: When Success Hurts
Success is usually praised. Long hours, constant availability, and high output can look like dedication, ambition, or strong character. Yet work can also become a way to avoid pain, numb stress, or outrun uncomfortable emotions. Sometimes the problem is not loving your career. The problem is needing work so much that rest feels threatening, relationships […]
Relapse vs Slip: How Recovery Plans Reduce Shame
Setbacks in recovery can feel crushing, especially when shame quickly turns one hard moment into a harsh story about who you are. People often assume any return to an unwanted behavior means total failure, but recovery is usually more nuanced than that. Understanding the difference between a slip and a relapse can create room for […]
Pornography Addiction and the Brain: What Research Shows
Porn use exists on a spectrum, and not everyone who views it has an addiction. Still, some people notice a pattern that feels increasingly hard to control. They may spend more time than intended, hide their behavior, or keep returning to it despite relationship, work, or emotional consequences. Research on compulsive sexual behavior suggests that […]
Managing Triggers in Recovery: Tools for Couples
Triggers can show up fast in recovery, a tone of voice, a phone notification, a change in plans. When it comes to managing triggers in recovery, couples healing after betrayal, compulsive sexual behavior, or other trust ruptures may feel like those moments are bigger than the present, as if the body is reliving what happened. […]
How Partners Heal Differently After Trauma
Trauma rarely impacts two people in identical ways. Even when partners share the same event, their bodies, histories, and coping patterns can push healing in different directions. One person may want to talk constantly, while the other goes quiet. One may seek closeness, while the other needs space. Charlotte Counseling Associates often hears couples say, […]
Intimacy After Betrayal: Rebuilding Trust and Safety
Betrayal can flip intimacy upside down. You may want closeness and comfort, yet your body stays on alert, scanning for danger, reading tone, checking phones, replaying details, or bracing for another shock. Hypervigilance is not “being dramatic”, it is often a nervous system response to a broken sense of safety. Partners often get stuck in […]
Marriage Counseling in Charlotte, NC: What to Expect
Marriage problems rarely start with one big moment. More often, couples drift into patterns, repeated arguments, emotional distance, or a quiet sense that something is off. If you are considering marriage counseling in Charlotte, NC, the idea can bring hope and nerves at the same time, especially if you worry you will be blamed or […]
Couples Therapy After Porn Use: Where to Start
Porn use can create a confusing mix of emotions in a relationship, shock, anger, grief, shame, and a deep fear that nothing will feel safe again. Some couples argue constantly. Others go quiet, functioning on the surface while both partners feel alone underneath. Couples therapy can help, but the first step is often clarity, what […]
Boundaries After Betrayal: What They Are and Are Not
Betrayal can make everything feel uncertain, including what you are allowed to ask for and what you can reasonably expect. After disclosure, many people swing between tightening control to feel safe and giving up needs to keep the peace. Neither extreme tends to create real security. Boundaries are one of the most practical tools for […]
Therapeutic Disclosure: Why Timing and Support Matter
After an affair, pornography secrecy, or other sexual boundary violations, many couples feel pulled between two urgent needs: “Tell me everything,” and “I can’t handle any more.” Therapeutic disclosure is designed to hold both truths at once, offering a structured way to share information without turning the conversation into a new trauma. Disclosure is not […]
Rebuilding Trust After an Affair: A Therapy Roadmap
The aftermath of an affair can feel like living in two realities at once. One part of you wants to repair what mattered, and another part is scanning for danger, replaying details, and wondering what was real. Trust does not come back because someone is sorry. It returns through repeated experiences of safety, honesty, and […]
Online Therapy in NC and SC: Privacy, Safety, and Fit
Online therapy in NC and SC can be a practical, meaningful way to get support, especially when schedules are tight, childcare is complicated, or you live far from a specialist. For many people, meeting from home reduces barriers and helps therapy become a consistent part of life. Privacy and safety questions are normal. You might […]
Men’s Group Therapy in Charlotte: Is It Right for You?
Considering men’s group therapy in Charlotte, NC often starts with a sense of being stuck. For many men, feeling stuck does not look like falling apart. It looks like working harder, getting quieter, and carrying stress alone until something finally gives, a relationship, sleep, patience, or self-respect. Group therapy offers a different path: healing in […]
Therapy for Betrayed Partners in Charlotte: What Helps
Looking for therapy for betrayed partners in Charlotte, NC often comes after a sudden shock to the system. Betrayal can feel like your whole reality changed overnight. Many partners describe it as shock, grief, rage, and numbness all at once, sometimes cycling hour to hour. Even if you are functioning at work or caring for […]
Finding a CSAT in Charlotte, NC: How to Choose
Looking for a CSAT therapist in Charlotte, NC can bring up a mix of urgency and uncertainty. Maybe you are trying to stop compulsive sexual behavior, rebuild trust after disclosure, or figure out whether your relationship can heal. In that moment, it helps to have a clear way to evaluate your options. A Certified Sex […]
Porn Use and Shame: When It Becomes a Problem
Porn use can carry a heavy emotional charge, even for people who never expected it to become a struggle. Some feel conflicted because their values do not match their behavior. Others feel stuck in secrecy, promising themselves it will be the last time, then repeating the same cycle. Shame often sits at the center of […]
EMDR for Trauma: Who It Helps and How It Works
Trauma can leave you feeling stuck in the past even when life looks “fine” on the outside. A sound, a smell, a tone of voice, or a moment of conflict can bring your body right back to an earlier experience, complete with panic, numbness, or shame. EMDR therapy for trauma, short for Eye Movement Desensitization […]
Partner Betrayal Trauma: First Steps After Disclosure
Disclosure can land like a shock to the body, even when part of you suspected something was wrong. You might swing between numbness and panic, feel unable to eat or sleep, or replay details on a loop. Those reactions are not weakness, they are common trauma responses to a sudden loss of safety in an […]
Sex Addiction Recovery: What to Expect in Therapy
You are not alone if you feel confused, scared, or even skeptical about starting sex addiction recovery therapy. Many people wait until consequences pile up, then worry they will be judged or forced into a one size fits all program. A good therapy process is different, it is collaborative, structured, and focused on helping you […]
Rebuilding Intimacy After Affair Trauma: A Practical Guide for Couples
Affair trauma can feel like the ground has disappeared beneath a relationship. For many couples, discovery brings shock, grief, anger, confusion, and a profound sense of loss. Even when both partners want to repair the relationship, intimacy often feels broken or unsafe. Emotional closeness may feel distant, and physical connection can feel complicated, pressured, or […]
Understanding and Healing Complex Betrayal Trauma in Relationships
What Is Betrayal Trauma? Betrayal trauma occurs when someone you deeply trust—often a partner—breaks that trust in a way that causes emotional, psychological, or even physical harm. This type of trauma often arises in situations involving infidelity, hidden sexual behaviors, emotional affairs, or other breaches of honesty. Unlike general emotional pain, betrayal trauma cuts to […]
Understanding Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)
When Seasons Affect Your Mood As the days grow shorter and the air turns crisp, many people notice a shift in their mood and energy. For some, this change is more than just the “winter blues” — it’s a type of depression known as Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). In this post, we’ll explore what SAD is, […]
Five Powerful Benefits of Using Brainspotting
Powerful for for Healing and Growth If you have or haven’t heard of the powerful therapy model, “Brainspotting“, either way you will definitely be in for a treat as we look at the five powerful benefits of using brainspotting. In recent years, Brainspotting (BSP) has emerged as one of the most effective tools for emotional healing, trauma […]
Five Benefits of Being Grateful
Five benefits of being grateful: In a fast-paced world full of deadlines, distractions, and daily stressors, it’s easy to overlook the simple act of gratitude. But being grateful isn’t just about saying “thank you” — it’s a mindset, a practice, and a powerful tool that can transform your life in unexpected ways. Whether you’re expressing […]
Fall is Here: Five Ways to Deal with the Sadness
Fall is Here: Five Ways to Deal with the Sadness During This Season The leaves fall like rusted memories.The air turns colder—not just outside, but inside.Autumn doesn’t always come with pumpkin spice and cozy sweaters.Sometimes, it arrives with grief, nostalgia, and a silence too loud to ignore. If you’re feeling it—the shift during the fall […]
Betrayal Trauma: When Trust Is Shattered — And How Healing Begins
Betrayal Trauma: When Trust Is Shattered. Few things cut as deeply as betrayal—especially when it comes from someone we deeply trusted. Whether it’s a partner, parent, friend, or spiritual leader, betrayal trauma strikes at the very core of our emotional and psychological safety. It’s more than just hurt feelings. It can feel like your entire […]
Understanding How EMDR Can Help Childhood Trauma
Healing the Wounds Within with EMDR: Understanding Family and Childhood Trauma & How EMDR Can Help Childhood is meant to be a time of safety, nurturing, love, and learning. But for many, those early years are marked by pain, neglect, or fear. Whether it’s growing up in a home with physical or emotional abuse, neglectful […]
What Is Trauma — And How EMDR and Brainspotting Can Help With Healing
Trauma is a word we often hear, but may not always fully understand. It goes beyond difficult memories or upsetting experiences. Trauma can linger in the body and mind, dramatically influencing our emotions, behaviors, and relationships in ways we may not even recognize. Fortunately, specialized trauma therapies like EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) and Brainspotting are transforming the […]
Five Benefits of Using Empathy with Your Significant Other
Five Benefits of Using Empathy with Your Significant Other: Relationships thrive on connection, and one of the most powerful tools to deepen that connection is empathy. When you genuinely understand and feel what your partner is going through, you create a safe, supportive, and emotionally fulfilled space. But empathy isn’t just about being kind—it’s about actively […]
The Power of Attending an Empathy Class
The Power of Attending an Empathy Class This can really help your Betrayed Partner Heal The power of attending a men’s empathy class for betrayed partners. When a partner experiences betrayal—especially in the form of infidelity or broken trust—it can fracture or almost destroy the foundation of your relationship. One of the most critical, yet […]
Title: The Power of Assertiveness: Building Secure Attachment and Preventing Resentment in Relationships
The Power of Assertiveness: Building Secure Attachment and Preventing Resentment in Relationships. In any close relationship—platonic, romantic, or familial —the ability to express yourself honestly and respectfully is not just a communication skill; it’s a foundation for emotional safety. At the core of secure, resilient relationships is assertiveness—the often underrated ability to speak up for your […]
The Importance of Therapeutic Professional Disclosure After an Affair or the Discovery of Sex Addiction
It is crucial to have a Therapeutic Professional Disclosure After an Affair or the Discovery of Sex Addiction Infidelity and sex addiction are among the most devastating betrayals a couple can face. The emotional toll—shock, grief, confusion, rage, shame, and deep insecurity—can shake the very foundation of a relationship. In the wake of such discovery, […]
Reclaiming Wholeness: The Benefits of Joining a Sexual Recovery Therapeutic Group
Reclaiming Wholeness with a sexual recovery therapeutic group. Healing from sexual trauma, addiction, or problematic behavior is a deeply personal journey—but it doesn’t have to be a lonely one. Many people facing sexual addictive behaviors feel isolated, ashamed, or misunderstood. In these moments, therapeutic groups offer a powerful, transformative space to support healing, growth, and […]
Healing the Wounds of Betrayal: How EMDR Therapy Can Help
Healing the wounds of betrayal trauma—whether from infidelity/sex addiction, lying, or a profound breach of trust—cuts deep. It will shake the very foundation of safety, your relationship bond, and your identity. Survivors often feel trapped in cycles of intrusive memories, self-doubt, and emotional overwhelm. Traditional talk therapy can help, but for many, it only scratches […]
When Memories Won’t Let Go: How Sexual Betrayal Triggers Intrusive Thoughts
When Memories Won’t Let Go: How Sexual Betrayal Triggers Intrusive Thoughts. Discovering that your significant other has sexually betrayed you—whether through infidelity, pornography addiction, or secret sexual behavior—can feel like the emotional ground beneath you has been ripped away. What follows is not just heartbreak but often cascading mental and emotional aftershocks. One of the […]
Men and Sexual Betrayal: Breaking the Silence and Finding Healing
Men and Sexual Betrayal: Breaking the Silence and Finding Healing When we talk about the pain of sexual betrayal—infidelity, emotional affairs, or addictive sexual behavior—we often assume the conversation centers on women. But men experience betrayal trauma too, and for many, the wounds are just as deep, the confusion just as overwhelming, and the silence even […]
Understanding PTSD and How EMDR Can Help
Understanding PTSD and How EMDR Can Help Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is a mental health condition that can develop after an individual has experienced or witnessed a traumatic event. The trauma might include being betrayed by your significant other, natural disasters, accidents, physical or sexual assault, military combat, or even prolonged exposure to violence or […]
Speak Your Truth: Five ways to be assertive at work
In the office jungle, where caffeine-fueled meetings and passive-aggressive emails roam free, assertiveness is your compass. It’s not aggression’s bigger cousin, nor is it shy silence dressed in a tie. Assertiveness is the calm, clear and direct voice that says: “This is what I need, and here’s how we win together.” Ready to own your […]
Caught in an Affair or Struggling with Sex Addiction: 5 Crucial Steps to Take
Caught in an Affair or Struggling with Sex Addiction: 5 Crucial Steps to Take Being caught in an affair or confronting sex addiction by your spouse can be a devastating moment for both parties involved. The trust is broken, emotions are raw, and the road to healing can seem overwhelming. Whether it’s an affair that’s […]
What is EMDR?
In the world of mental health and addiction’s therapy, there are many methods designed to help people heal from trauma and emotional distress. One such approach is Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR). Developed by Francine Shapiro in the late 1980s, EMDR has gained recognition for its effectiveness in treating post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and […]
Five Ways to be Assertive in Everyday Life
Five Ways to be Assertive in Everyday Life. Assertiveness how to ask for what you want. Assertiveness is a valuable skill that helps you communicate your needs, thoughts, and boundaries effectively while respecting others. Here are five practical strategies to cultivate assertiveness in various aspects of your life: 1. Practice Clear Communication Clear communication forms the […]
Five Ways to Share Appreciation in Your Relationship
Five Ways to Share Appreciation in Your Relationship: Read this to learn five ways to share appreciation in your relationship. Appreciation is the cornerstone of a healthy and thriving relationship. It reinforces love, builds trust, and enhances emotional connection. Here are five meaningful ways to express appreciation to your partner from the book, The Five […]
Men’s empathy group, how to help her heal after betrayal:
How to help her heal after betrayal. Have you been betrayed before? Being betrayed from someone you love and trust, perhaps more than anyone else in the world, really hurts! It can feel like a bomb has exploded and you are left to pick up the pieces. Your partner may be trying to help repair […]
Coping with Partner Betrayal
Coping with Partner Betrayal: How Therapy and Support Groups Can Help You Today. Discovering that your partner has betrayed your trust can be devastating! It shakes the very foundation of your relationship and leaves you grappling with a range of emotions. However, during this painful time, therapy and support groups offer much needed resources to […]
Five ways to heal pornography addiction
Five ways to heal pornography addiction: Healing from pornography addiction is a challenging journey that requires dedication, support, and a variety of strategies to effectively overcome its grip. Here are five essential ways to approach this process: 1. Seek Professional Help One of the most crucial steps in addressing pornography addiction is seeking professional guidance. Therapists […]
Navigating Partner Betrayal: Five Steps to Heal and Move Forward
Navigating Partner Betrayal Navigating Partner Betrayal. We’ve all heard the stories or perhaps even lived through the chilling experience of betrayal – the world-shattering revelation that someone we trusted has deceived or hurt us in a deeply personal way. The sledgehammer of betrayal in a relationship can manifest through a litany of wounds, from the […]
Five incredible benefits to be an assertive man
Are you feeling stuck or burnt out at work and tired of not receiving that promotion. How about struggling with your significant other or other family members and friends, and feeling like you can’t say “no”, even when you want to? As a Men’s Assertiveness coach and therapist, I work with men who want to […]
What is Betrayal Trauma
By Brittany Coulsting, LCMCA, APTT (Associate Partner Trauma Therapist). What is Betrayal Trauma? This is a specific trauma that occurs when someone we depend on for survival and protection, violates our trust and well-being in a critical way. Partner betrayal in a romantic relationship often takes the form of infidelity and involves the act of […]
Empathy: The benefit in relationships
by Robert McGuire, Jr., LCMHC, CSAT-C, EMDR-Trained therapist, located in Charlotte, NC. Empathy is not sympathy Empathy is getting into the shoes or seeing through the eyes or literally slipping into the experience of another person. Empathy is feeling what I am feeling, knowing what I am knowing, understanding what I am understanding, experiencing what […]
Do you struggle with your partners wants or needs?
Let’s talk about Love Languages. By Kaitlynn E. Divine, LMFTACharlotte, NC What is a love language? Dr. Gary Chapman is a counselor and the author of “The 5 Love Languages.” As a counselor he examined couple’s patterns and complaints that they had for one another. Through working with couples, he wrote his book on love […]
4 Horsemen – Defensiveness (Part 3 of 4)
Charlotte, NC Defensiveness one of four relationship harming behaviors Through the extensive research and work of John Gottman (world renowned author, researcher, and marriage therapist) four behaviors were identified that are likely to harm any relationship, especially an intimate relationship such as marriage. These are criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. This series will cover all […]
4 Horsemen – Contempt (Part 2 of 4)
Contempt Through the extensive research and work of John Gottman (world renowned author, researcher, and marriage therapist) four behaviors were identified that are likely to harm any relationship, especially an intimate relationship such as marriage. These are criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. This series will cover all four. Last time we explored criticism, and today’s […]
Back to the Office Anxiety:
Can we get back to the office without some anxiety: This pandemic brought along with it a lot of challenges, including new ways of living for most of us. When the pandemic happened everything about our daily structures changed and that may have caused a lot of anxiety. Now, we are moving back towards normality, […]
4 Horsemen – Criticism (Part 1 of 4)
by Robert McGuire, LCMHC, EMDR-Trained Therapist When couples are struggling, look at these four behaviors: Through the extensive research and work of John Gottman (world renowned author, researcher, and marriage therapist) four behaviors were identified that are likely to harm any relationship, especially an intimate relationship such as marriage. These are criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and […]
Top five ways to take back control of your mental health
Is Trauma the New Normal? Charlotte, NC What is Trauma? In today’s time we are hearing a lot about this word and for some it can be scary. Kids are experiencing trauma right now. They have been without a normal school schedule for over a year now and being online has most likely caused depression, […]
Technology, Self Esteem, and Boundaries
The effects of technology The effects of technology are starting to be revealed in our everyday interactions. The things that used to be done in person have been completely streamlined to the online world. Other examples are dating, socializing, employment, and entertainment. Let’s put this in perspective statista.com shows that in 2011 the average daily […]
Being a Dad,Even a Single Man in 2021 can be Challenging
Being a man in general can be tough First of all, let me say that I am a man and a dad and it can be challenging. Have you ever asked yourself why this is? Well the truth is that there are many reasons why this may be, which we will discuss later. However, if […]
Fighting the Cold Winter Blue’s
Jamine Colegrove, LCSW, in Charlotte, North Carolina Fighting the Cold Winter Blue’sAs the season changes for some, so does our mood. The lack of Vitamin D that we receive fromthe sun, gloomy weather, and lack of outdoor activities can all contribute to our moodsfluctuating throughout the winter months. This weather change can be even more […]
Struggling with work/life balance in a post-covid world
Jasmine Colegrove, LCSW, Charlotte, North Carolina Watch this short video to learn more about what you can do about having stress due to work like balance in a post-covid world. For more information, please contact Jasmine at Jasmine@charlottecounselors.com or 704-981-1170, www.charlotttecounselors.com
What are Trauma Wounds, and why you should work on them?
If you are struggling with traumatic events in the Carolinas, both North and South Carolina, please let us know and we are happy to provide a free 15 call to see if we or someone we are connected to can help. We are located in Charlotte, NC. Please view this short video on what trauma […]
How To Thrive During Covid-19
Charlotte Counseling Associates, serving North and South Carolina We are living during challenging times Are you struggling over seven months into Covid-19 here locally in Charlotte, NC or perhaps elsewhere in the United States? You are not alone. Please look at this short video to learn more about what you can do to stay healthy, […]
Family Connection Tips from a Charlotte, NC Therapist
The importance of family connection: Family connection begins with the environment that parents create for their children. A home with healthy communication styles, warm and inviting interactions, consistency, and boundaries breeds ongoing connection. The attachment theory better explains in what ways the relationship with our primary caretakers can affect the family unit. Attachment Theory John […]
Relationship Advice from a Charlotte, NC Therapist
See short video regarding appreciation in Relationships: What’s a relationship if it isn’t with it’s up’s and downs? Right… Well, when we get into a relationship with someone, the plan is to be in love and loved. Yet because of miscommunication and different values and upbringings, we have conflict. How can we keep love alive? […]
5 Tips For Coping With Anxiety: Back To School During Covid-19 From a Charlotte, NC Therapist
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCzFYeKisxLlgd8hRHn5VSdQ?view_as=subscriber It’s time for kids to go back to school if you’re kiddo hasn’t begun, they soon will, and many parents are feeling the pressure to decide about in-person learning and remaining virtual. The stress of preparing your child for the new school year can bring down anyone’s mood; with school shopping, getting back on […]
Sex Addiction in the Covid-19 Era
See this fun and informative video presentation on sex/porn addiction in the Covid-19 Era presented by David Sanchez, LCMHC, LCAS, CSAT, Brain spotting II Therapist and Michelle Holleman, LCAS-A, ASAT, EMDR Trained Therapist. https://www.facebook.com/charlottecounselors/videos/1155197664834248/
Five Ways to Combat Anxiety During Covid-19
Are you feeling stressed or anxious right now? Currently we are facing an unprecedented time, where you, I and everybody is awaiting a massive storm. What makes it even more frightening, is that this storm is invisible. If you are feeling excessively worried during the crisis with COVID-19 otherwise know at the Corona Virus, you […]
Is Your Husband or Boyfriend a Nice Guy?
Is your husband or boyfriend a nice guy? I believe that everyone wants to have a compassionate, loving, and vulnerable relationship in their lives. When we first begin to date, we may see those qualities in the other person. However; due to what researchers call attachment, we may not really notice that the person […]
Are You a Nice Guy? (Part 2)
If you read my last blog, being a nice guy generally leads to not being a nice guy. What I mean by this is that if a man continues to be there for everyone and is constantly trying to please others, he may find himself feeling stressed, empty, depressed and irritable. This is not […]
No More Mr. Nice Guy
No More Mr. Nice Guy 4 minute read David Sanchez, LPC, LCAS, CSAT, EMDR Therapist Are you a nice guy? A popular book for men entitled, “No more Mr. Nice Guy” was written by Dr. Robert Glover back in 2003. The title was controversial, but the main premise was that many men where caught in […]
Why Do Men Go It Alone? Part 1
Men and receiving help When you look at movies such as Rocky or the Lone Ranger, you start to see that many men have been fed this message that we have to go it all or mostly alone. What I mean by that is that many men are raised being told, “Don’t be sad”, “Don’t cry”, “Just […]
Can Four Parts Make a Whole?
Can Four Parts Make a Whole? Everyone has a story to tell. We all have a past, and each of us our own journey. At the age of 13, I knew I would be a therapist. I wanted to be a helper, a nurturer, and a vessel for others to grow, change, and heal. […]
Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll
Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll David Sanchez, CSAT When people ask me what I do for a living, I could easily say that I work with individuals that have a problem with sex, drugs, and/or rock and roll, but it is so much more than this. As a therapist, I am trained […]
Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction
Are you struggling with your erectile dysfunction during sex? Understanding Porn-Induced Erectile Dysfunction: A Threat to Intimacy In today’s digital age, access to adult websites has become easier than ever before. While this may seem harmless or even pleasurable at first, prolonged exposure to pornography can lead to significant consequences. One of which is porn-induced […]
Pornography Addiction, Why is This So Bad For a Relationship?
David Sanchez, LPC, LCAS, CSAT, EMDR Therapist Certified Sex Addiction Therapist in Charlotte, NC I see many men coming to my office wondering, “what’s the big deal about watching porn?” Simply put, most of their significant others do not appreciate that they are fantasizing and watching other women have sex, even if its not […]
Can Erectile Dysfunction Be Caused By Porn?
Are you dealing with erectile dysfunction? I have recently heard men talking about erectile dysfunction in my practice. Did you know that this is the most common sexual challenge men face? This is very difficult for men as their sexual performance can be a sign of their manhood. They report that this is difficult for […]
Three Signs of Sexual and/or Pornography Addiction and Next Steps
Please see my quick and informative video on the three signs of Sexual and Porn addiction and what to do next. For more information please call us at 980-263-9608 or email us at admin@charlottecounselors.com
Why Are Men So Stressed Out?
I don’t know about you, but as I man myself, we can be super stressed. Men are usually taught to not show emotions, pull up their bootstraps, and to just get it done. That works great in war, or during a crisis, however; it is very bad for your health in the long run. […]
Is All This Pain Really from Anxiety?
Anxiety is a common symptom that almost everyone experiences in their lifetime. You may feel anxious when walking into a job interview or when meeting a new person or learning a new task. For some people anxiety can turn into chronic worry and can hinder their life and bring on great suffering. According to the […]
Why are men so anxious?
by David Sanchez, Anxiety Counselor in Charlotte, NC In today’s fast paced world men are taught that they need to work hard and absolutely under no circumstances are they to fail. Failure is unacceptable and with all this pressure it is easier to see why they develop anxiety symptoms from fear of […]
What Should I do if I am with a Sex or Porn Addict?
01/28/18 I work with many men who meet criteria for sex and/or porn addiction every day. One thing I notice is that although they are struggling with the consequences of their acting out behaviors, what about their significant others? In my clinical experience, which is backed up by the research, the significant other of […]
Am I a Sex Addict?
You may be wondering if you are or are not a sex addict. This can be determined by a Certified Sexual Addiction Therapist, however; a first step would be to take this questionnaire. PATHOS If you answered yes to one or more of these questions, I would like to invite you to […]
Charlotte Counselors, 28210
I became a counselor in order to work side by side with my clients to move towards the life they want. Change and hope are not just fantasies, but can truly happen when someone is motivated to stop doing what is not working and to be able to step back, receive some guidance, and then […]
Can Workaholism lead to Sex Addiction?
By David Sanchez, LPC, LCAS, CSAT, EMDR Therapist Can workaholism lead to sex addiction? The answer depends on how the workaholic was raised, regarding being subject to any form of abuse, neglect, trauma and/or abandonment etc. If this was the case, then an individual could use one or more substances and/or behaviors to “numb out” […]
Seven (7) Signs of Pornography Addiction
09/27/17 By David Sanchez, LPC, LCAS, CSAT-C, EMDR Therapist. Did you know that pornography addiction is somewhat different than sex addiction? Yes, pornography addiction deals more with excessive pornography use with or without masturbation. Once an individual moves over from using pornography excessively to the point where it is affecting one or more areas […]
What is Sex and Pornography Addiction?
What is Sex/Porn Addiction? by David Sanchez 09/24/17 Please see this short and informative where David Sanchez, Certified Sex Addiction Therapist-C, explains the basics of sex and pornography addiction. For more information on sex and pornography addiction please call David Sanchez a Charlotte counseling private practice at 980-263-9608 or email him at admin@charlottecounselors.com
The Great Porn Experiment
07/10/17 This is a great Ted talk on the negative effects of compulsive pornography watching called “The great porn experiment” by Gary Wilson. If you haven’t seen this, it is definitely worth watching and helps us see that pornography can become a major problem effecting our health and relationships. Watch this video and decide for […]
Fear of Failure (Part 1)
We as human tend to hate failure. Many of my clients, male and female, share that this is one of there biggest fears. Whether I work with a 18 year old male student, 25 year old professional female, or 42 year old married male they each have similar fears. The fear of failure is often […]
What is Sex Addiction
What is Sex Addiction Sex addiction, according to Rob Weiss, is also known as “hypersexuality” or “hypersexual disorder”, is a dysfunctional preoccupation with sexual fantasy and behavior, often involving the obsessive pursuit of non-intimate sex, pornography, compulsive masturbation, romantic intensity, and objectified partner sex. This adult obsessive pattern of thoughts and behaviors continues for a […]
Ten Steps to Prepare For an Electronic Fast For Your Children
Ten Steps to Prepare For an Electronic Fast For Your Children By David Sanchez, LPC, LCAS, CSAT-Candidate 05/25/16 It seems like most kinds these days always have some type of electronic device in front of them. If you are like me, you have noticed that in some cases they have totally ignored you […]
“Help, Does My Child Have a Video Game Addiction?”
“Help, My Son or Daughter May Be Developing a Video Game Addiction!” By David Sanchez, MS, LPC, LCAS Addictions Expert “Does my child have a video game addiction?” This is a hard question to answer because every kid and situation is different, however; if you are noticing the symptoms below, or anything that seems like […]
A tip for panic/anxiety attacks
Tip to help with an anxiety attack, by David Sanchez, re-blogged from Tamara Suttle –Look around you -Find 5 tips you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell and 1 thing you can taste. This is called grounding. It can help when you feel like […]
Are Video Games Addictive?
06/23/2015 Introduction by David Sanchez, MS, LPC, LCAS, Licensed Professional Counselor and Addictions Specialist. As I am meeting with more and more adolescents that are having a problems with excessive video game playing, I have noticed that this problem can truly be detrimental for their relationships, education and mental and physical health. If you notice […]
Are you Sad?
Are you Sad? Seasonal Affective Disorder affects millions in the United States every year, however there is something you can do about it. January 21, 2015 During the fall/winter season, you may notice a sharp difference in the weather. Notably it may rain a lot more, the skies become more cloudy and gloomy (unless you […]
Parents: It’s never too early to speak to your children about drugs and alcohol
Speaking with your kids about drugs and alcohol: It’s never too early By David Sanchez, MS, LPC, LCAS Licensed Professional Counselor and Addiction’s Expert 1/14/15 Let’s be honest, parenting can be a challenge at times, especially when it comes to speaking to your kids about drugs and alcohol. Some parents prefer to avoid or delay […]
Pornography Addiction
Sexual Addiction: Understanding the Addiction Cycle Unfortunately, pornography addiction takes more than it promises to give. Here is a great article on this I found by Eric Gomez, licensed counselor, regarding the nature of pornography addiction as explained by one of the world’s renown sexual addiction experts, Dr. Patrick Carnes. Seeking Understanding Sexual Addiction is not […]
Why see a counselor?
Why See a Counselor? 10/28/14 by David Sanchez, LPC, LCAS I have often wondered why millions of people can benefit from professional counseling, but on average only about 10% of the U.S. population actually takes advantage of it. Like anything that is important and meaningful in life, professional counseling takes patience, effort and practice. For […]